I’m trying to stop being angry, so I can enjoy Christmas and bask in all its holy joy. Yet, still, two days before the big day, I’m still cranky/sad/angry/overwhelmed. With that said, I want to get these things off of my chest and out into the universe. If you find them to be a bummer, don’t feel the need to read more. If you find comfort in knowing someone else has these feelings, I’m your man and this is your article.

#1, COVID. I’m sad because 2020 is the most lethal year ever for Americans. I’m angry because it didn’t have to be this way. We had a plan for how to deal with a pandemic. Trump threw it out. That’s on him. We only had so much patience for such a catastrophe, having not had anything like it for 100 years. What did we do with the time we had, before Round 2 came on? We wasted it! We wasted it with lies, and name calling, and bullying and straight out B.S!

Some people held political rallies, motorcycle gatherings, some “fought for their freedom” to kill others. The Narcissist in Charge held rallies, denied the existence of the virus, encouraged others to not wear masks, and — even when people knew he lied! — they went to see him! What the actual f… we’re they thinking?!?!

So what did that do to us? Did they get sick or not? Did they die? It doesn’t matter!!! What they did was was waste time… time where we could have stockpiled PPE, time where medical people could have rested, time when you and I could have had an economy. Yes, those who went did these things! They — not the cautious, or liberal or the believer in science — did this! They destroyed or economy! The virus killed people who didn’t ask for it. That’s the nature of a virus. But now, our whole f….ing health care system is broken, doctors and nurses have lost their energy to fight, and we keep shipping more and more people to them, to burden them even more! That is on the people who knew what they were doing and didn’t care! I want them to feel the full weight of their choices! I want them to feel guilty! I want them to feel regret… for the rest of their miserable lives! And I want to not be this angry all the time about it. Because anger is a secondary emotion, after hurt, I’m finally getting to the sadness I’ve felt about it. Damn, that’s a lot of sadness…..

#2 Is it too much to ask that Donald Trump just shut up! I’m so sick of hearing the irritating thing, the criminal thing, the challenging thing, the immoral thing, or the just plain stupid things he says every single day. Assuming we survive to see Joe Biden and Kamala Harris inaugurated, (and, yes, that’s still a orry of mine), I never want to hear that man or his family, or his sycophants, or anyone else to speak for him. I want my government to be boring for a while. I want to not think about politics for days, even weeks, at a time. I never want to worry like this again. Four plus years is enough terror for me..

#3, Sin. I’m really “sin-sick and sorrow worn” this year. I’m sick of being lied to. I’m sick of arguing with people that don’t have me or others in mind when they live their lives. I’m sick of half-truths and I’m sick of trying to decode what this person or that person really means. I’m sick of people saying hate isn’t hate. I’m sick of people yelling at me that they know Jesus, when Jesus wouldn’t recognize them on the street as followers of His. Lie? Cheat? Steal? People do them, and always have. They didn’t brag about it. Now, they’re mad if you don’t. Is it because they don’t know Jesus or have ever read his words? I’m not talking about salvation here. I’m talking about acting like Jesus, or Mohammed, or Buddha or any number of religious people lived. Salvation is great and all, but that’s “gravy” that Christians get. Caring, compassion, love, empathy… these are the things we should be aiming for in this life, here and now. In any case, I would like Jesus to be heard, so the planet and life in general can aim in the direction of those things.

#4, Children in cages. Families separated when they ask for help — and the effects of #1, #2, and #3 above on them. This should never have happened are should never happen again. The fact that I have to even say this makes me cry.

#5. Income inequality. Some of it is bound to happen. Maybe some people are worth more to society because of what they do. Ok, I’ll give you that. But, after a certain point — a point we reached years ago — its just absurd. If you have ever experienced the stress of not paying your bills — and therefore not eating, or having a roof over your heads, or being able to meet your children’s, or family’s, needs. You know how hard that is. It’s excruciating to know about or watch when people in the top 1% or 1/2 of 1% could feed a whole city for a year with their income … and won’t,

This world could be so much better if we just tried to do the right thing. I’m actually out of words right now because we are so very far off of where we should be. Some of us remember kindness as a norm. There are whole generations that don’t. I want to leave all of this behind in 2021.

It occurs to me as write all of this, that Jesus said a version of this… “If anyone causes one of these little ones—those who believe in me—to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. 7 “Woe to the world because of the things that cause people to stumble! Such things must come, but woe to the person through whom they come!”

It’s that seventh verse that is what I mean. Things are going to happen in life. Could we just not be people that make things worse for each other intentionally? That’s all I’m asking…

Resisting in Peace,

John